Six Reasons Why

As I look out my window on this election morning, I see piles and piles of leaves blanketing the ground and a light fog hanging over the rooftops of this town.  It is a magical sight, and makes me think of waking up at my parent's house on Thanksgiving morning to the smell of cooking turkey and the sound of the parade on TV.  Every season of the year has it's magic, but none is greater than this.

And as I eagerly await the results of this election, more out of curiosity than any kind of strong hope one way or the other, my sluggish mind is trying to wrap its self around post-modern ideas about writing as presented in my online classes.  It's the last thing I want to be doing right now.  Falling asleep next to the space heater, reading some C.S. Lewis, or bundling up for a run in the crisp fall air sound far more appealing.  But I know that I'm learning a lot at this school, both by way of technical craft and by way of philosophy, if only by learning exactly what I am not.  So before I go back to competing with far greater minds than mine on the online discussion boards, I feel the need to establish very clearly why it is that I write.

I write to capture beauty.

Philippians 4:8 - "Finally, brethren, whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy- meditate on these things."

I understand that life is not all sunshine and roses.  Indeed if it were, there would be no such thing as plot!  Grief, suffering, physical pain, emotional pain, and war all have their place in the tales of this world.  Writing about these things in order to make a point is all well and good, but I will not explore scenes of misery, death, decay, and disorder merely for the sake of exploring them.  There is always hope in this world, because Christ came to save sinners. I want to find the beauty in things and capture them in words, transporting readers to a world which is broken, but worth saving- just like ours.

I write to move people.
Words are powerful, and the right story can help us to deal with things that we have trouble facing in real life.  Emotions aren't everything, but they can also lead to actions, and if I can inspire just a few people to have more hope, faith, or joy in this life than I will be satisfied.

I write to show the triumph of good over evil.
It might be cliche, but I've read too many books and seen too many movies where the line between good and evil is blurred.  Main characters have serious character flaws, all in the name of realism, but they are excusable because of his ultimate triumph.  The bad guy is only a few shades darker than the hero, or perhaps in the end he was a better man all together. These are not the kinds of stories I want my children to grow up reading!  I wish more people would write stories about the knight in shinning armor, who struggles against the evil within him but ultimately does what is right.

I write for a healthy escape.
For now, the escape is for me, but maybe someday it will provide escape for others, too. I'm not one to bash social media, but I do think we live in a time where the temptation to waste time is paramount.  Engaging in stories keeps my mind sharp and imagination fresh, which is profitable in it's place.  It also helps to keep me sane in a world of to-do lists and endless engagements.  Too much reality isn't good for anyone!

I write to provoke thought.
Novels may not be the best forum for preaching, but they can be a sort of "trojan horse" to convey important ethical, moral, and Biblical lessons.  I hope not just to write fluff which tickles the fancy of the reader- I want to leave them with something to chew on.

And last but not least...

I write to reflect the glory of God.
Our God is a God of beauty, of creation, of imagination, and of stories.  The first and most fundamental plot structure is that of this world- created, fallen, redeemed, and one day, restored.  I recognize that there may be far more important tasks which God may have for me to do than writing stories, and I certainly don't think of this as a heavenly calling or anything like that.  But I believe it glorifies Him when His created beings exercise the creative capacity He gave us to create things that magnify His creation, His work, and His person. I hope that the things that I write will cause my own heart and the hearts of others to love Him more!

Goals

I know that you don't accomplish anything by making lists, but these are some things that have been on my mind lately and I want to see them all in one place.  These are not the super important things in life, but the little things that make a big difference in the end.

1.  Read everything.
Toss by 100th page if something isn't good.

2.  Collect books.
Even if I never read them again.

3.  Utilize minutes.
Examine priorities and consciously choose where my time will be spent.

4.  Love people.
Even if they don't deserve it. I certainly don't.

5.  Become curious.
Google things, ask questions. Learn about stuff I don't care about.

6.  Appreciate beauty.
I never notice sunsets or great views until someone points them out.

7.  Be creative.
Decorate, dress up, do arts and crafts.

8.  Save inspiration.
Cut things out and hang them up.  Keep a notebook to write stuff down.

9.  Stop obsessing...
Over organization and control.

10.  Make friends.
And keep the old ones.  I need to start picking up the phone and calling people.

The Future

As most of you already know, Danny and I have been agonizing on how to spend the next threeish years of our life.  He is going back to school and it will most likely take him three years to complete the Master's program at UW- three years of late nights, cramming for exams, and endless homework.  You also all know that I quit my job back in May and have been very contentedly playing the roll of homeaker ever since.  But there is no question that while being at home is very satisfying to me, I'm going to need more than cooking and cleaning to keep me occupied while Danny is busy with school.  For a while I considered going back to finish my AA, which I came close to finishing before getting married.  But the truth is, while I want to have a degree to my name, I have no interest in any of the classes I have left to take, and I'm not sure the AA degree would ever do anything for me anyway.

So I've been looking into plan B, which is a little more fun.  This plan involves me working towards some kind of program in Creative Writing, and hopefully obtaining some kind of certificate for doing so.  I don't want to do anything that would take too long or cost very much- but if possible I'm hoping to find somewhere that I could attend, preferably on-line, that would have the kind of credentials to stretch and grow me as a writer.  At first I was doubtful that such an oporotunity existed, but I'm learning that there are options out there.  I am very excited and also intimidated- I know that if I dedicate myself to this plan and allow my husband's hard-earned money to pay for it, I can't squander this opportunity.  It's time to get serious about writing.

This is not an easy decision to make, because it is rather make-it or break-it.  I have been writing a lot lately, and maybe some day I'll have a completed manuscript that I could actually send off to a publisher.  Maybe they'll like it, maybe they won't.  I know a lot of people who would be quick to point out that it's almost impossible to make any money in this field and I probably won't be able to support myself with this degree if anything ever happens to my husband.  Maybe that's true- but the thing is, I don't stay comited to very many things for any length of time.  My desire to write, and write novels specifically, has been growing rather than shrinking since I was probably ten or twelve years old.  While I know God can make me happy in a life without writing, I also know that He has given me some element of talent here and with some refining, maybe I could use these skills for His glory.

I'm trying to be realistic about what this really means.  I know that no class or degree is going to automatically launch me from an amateur into a professional, and in the end of the day it's just going to take hard work and endless practice.  For another thing, I'm learning that I can't let this hobby/interest define me.  Even if I end up having six babies and never having time to write another word, that's okay.  My identiy lies in Christ, and however He chooses to use me is fine with me.  Also, I've come to tearms with the fact that eventually people are going to have to read what I've writen, and they might not like it.  I can't make everybody happy, even among my closest friends and family.  And last but not least, I'm never going to write a New York Times Bestseller- because the things I am most passionate about are not the things people of this world want to read about.  Because of this, I've been learning to write for the love of it, not for any other reason.

By the way I've also been super inspired by my sister, who just self-published her second novel at the age of 15.  If she can do it, I can do it, right?  Ha, not a good assumption to make, but it's still inspiring!

So those are my plans for now.  It is in a sense the cliche leap of faith.  We'll see how God works and hopefully, this will not be a waste in the end!

Imagine that...

I recently read somewhere that it's really important to do something that you love every day, even if it's just for fifteen minutes.  And I thought- fifteen minutes.  I can do that, right?  The problem is deciding on what you love and locking into it, and learning to do it without hemming and hawing and hating whatever words end up on the page (in the random example that what you "love" is writing).  In the olden days when I used to journal and blog for pages and pages without stopping long enough to streach my fingers, I used to write a lot better than I do now, when I'm constantly pausing to edit and re-think and mostly delete everything and start over.  So here I am writing, as fast as I can, not worrying about what words roll off the ends of my fingers or wondering if they make any sense.

No- I won't even re-read what I've written.  I'm reading a book right now called Imagine- you may have seen it prominently displayed at Barns and Nobles lately.  I latched onto it because it has the prettiest cover you can imagine- seriously, as soon as I got it home (my husband surprised me by ordering it on Amazon- love him!) I cut it up and hung it on a collase above my desk.  But then I opened it and started reading and it is actually a really cool science book about the creative faculties of human beings.  Aside from a slight evolutionary slant, it seems to be very grounded in facts and very insightful.  The imagination is one of the hardest things for scientists to understand, but of course like everything else they are getting closer all the time.  So far they know that moments of inspiration usually come when you're least expecting them, such as in the shower or right after you wake up, and when you're very relaxed- not posed with fingers clenched over the keyboard trying desperately to be brilliant.  I suppose that's a no-brainer.

More surprising, however, is the truth that you often are more creative when you're distracted- such as at work or in a busy coffee shop where you THINK you can't think.  The truth is, when your brain is trying to generate new ideas, it needs to be fed random snippets of information such as sights, smell and sounds to keep it from becoming stagnant.  Also, the strain of having to work with some constraints (such as form, metere, rules, assignment restrictions, etc) actually produces far more creative output than the very popular idea of letting your brain go completely and spewing out whatever random thing comes to mind.

So as it turns out, our God of order created our minds to work best in the realm of order.  How cool is that?

Update

I know it's been forever since I posted and I don't really have readers anymore, but once my life slows down a little it is one of my desires to start weekly updates here about my (scratch that) OUR life to help keep in touch with all of you and keep records for furutre scrapbooking/journaling endevors.  In the mean time, here's a little bit of what we've been up to so far this year:

JANUARY

We had the honor of attending Jessica and Peter Schmitt's wedding in January.  Jessica is an old co-op friend of mine and our weddings had many similarities.  It was Danny's and my first wedding as newly weds, and by far the most enjoyable one we'd ever attended, because it brought back so many good memories! This picture came from a photo booth they had set up for the guests, which was a genious idea.

FEBRUARY

The day before Valentines day, we went skiing with several church friends and family.  It was my third time going and I think I finally got the hang of it.  We rode the slopes until they shut them down late that night, and finally crawled into bed at 2:00AM!  Needless to say we were okay with staying home and taking naps on Valentines day. 

ALSO...

I had the prividge of helping Mom Villa host a baby shower for Christina.  It's so weird how grown up we all are now!!

MARCH

We went to Florida!  Danny's family usually spends a month there every year, and we were privildeged to join them at the condo they were renting for ten whole days.  We had a great time soaking in the sun by the pool every morning and eating out at the world's most AMAZING resturants pretty much every evening.  (Such a drain on the budget, but worth it!)  I've never been anywhere like Florida before and it was quite an experience.  We also went to Arizon the weekend before, but I don't have any pictures of that so I'll have to post those later.

And last but not least...

Abigail Rose Pederson was born on March 23rd!!  The Pederson's are some of our closest friends and relatives.  We were in Florida at the time and couldn't wait to come home and meet her.  We went over to the Pederson's on the 27th and couldn't believe how tiny and adorable she is.  She actually looks a little bit like Danny according to some of the relatives.  I can't wait to watch this little girl grow up.

So that's a little peak into our year.  Tune in next time for more detailed updates on Florida and Arizona! 

It is exactly, at this moment, 1 hour and thirty-three minutes until the weekend.  I thought I was going to have to work tomorrow, but I just found out that I actually don't.  This knowledge has brought the sun bursting through my very rain-clouded mind, which opens up today to ENDLESS possibilities- such as caffine after 4 oclock or back-to-back movies.  I may even make smoothies with BOTH fruits and veggies in them- who knows.  All I can say is, I am very much looking forward to this long work week comming to an end.

And just to make the fairy tale complete, I see real daytime starlight streaming through the wherehouse doors. 

ENJOY YOUR WEEKEND EVERYONE!!!

Writers Block

As you can probably guess from the title, I am just now in the middle of a TERRIBLE bout of writers block over the Sci Fi story I'm helping to write.  It's funny, because I've always wanted to be a splendiforous writer, but every time I start to get really into writing again and think that maybe, just maybe, I might make it, then something comes along and challenges the whole way I think about writing, and suddenly I realize how cliche or unoriginal or immature or boring or flamboyant or dry or whatever my writing is.  And then it's discouraging to even face a blank piece of paper.  


As Winston Churchill once said, "Writing a book is an adventure. To begin with, it is a toy and an amusement; then it becomes a mistress, and then it becomes a master, and then a tyrant. The last phase is that just as you are about to be reconciled to your servitude, you kill the monster, and fling him out to the public."


I like to think of myself as a brave warrior princess of a bygone age, going out clad in shinning armor with hair flowing in the wind to slay the beast of my own insufferable writers block.  But instead I find myself here, blogging to a nearly non-existent audience.  Which is okay, except that the picture of me blogging in Starbucks in real life includes all my flaws, whereas the writer of fabulous stories is free to remain gloriously incognito.  


I have a question to pose to what faithful readers I do have, however.  When you're reading, to you like to read a lot of description, or do you prefer a fast-moving story that leaves much to the imagination?  I find myself torn over this issue.  I want to write in a way that paints vivid pictures, but I don't want to ever put the brakes on my story long enough to describe things well.  The more I think about it, the more I realize I just need to make my descriptions creative enough to keep the reader totally engaged- and vivid enough to be breathtaking.  Which is hard to do... it requires more than the mere ability to put words together well.  You have to be able to think a certain way in order to write creatively, artistically- you have to be the kind of person who notices the little details and can make humorous or fictitious comparisons with them.


And that is where I find myself falling short.  While my imagination is fully functional when it comes to characters, places, and conversations, it has a hard time taking on the telling of those things in any other than a straightforward, completely UNimaginative way.  And while I like writing sentences that flow and crafting plot lines that play pleasantly with the human psyche, I don't like having to stop every few words to think about a really good comparison or totally unique adjective.  So.  That is my problem.  All you other aspiring writers out there should give me your opinions on the issue, because I am very easily inspired by your thoughts.  :-)