Saturday, November 6, 2010

at last

UPDATE ON COSTA RICA STUFF:

I am excited.

Yay! I've been dreading this for so long, and lately it's like God has been pealing away those layers of resistance. There have been many, many reasons why I've been not wanting to go, but I think the main one is that I just got too comfortable in the life I have now. Which is in many ways a blessing, but I'm beginning to feel restless again. And weather I feel like it or not when the time to leave comes, I know this will be good for me.

I have been realizing lately how much growing up I still have left to do. For a long time I thought I'd arrived at adulthood and wouldn't really change much more ever again. I was so happy to be gliding along living at this platou. And then things started going wildly downhill, and the world started spinning, and now BAM- all of my faults have been shaken to the surface, and I've got at least another six months of weeding to do.

Now I'm questioning weather you ever really "arrive." But I guess I'm kind of glad. What I thought was a platou may have very well been more of a rut. Life would be so borring if we ever stopped growing, changing- comming to hate everything about ourselves and starting over again from scratch.

I just put together a budget for myself of everything I could possibly need or want between now and when I get back from Costa Rica at the end of next October. I tried to be generous, putting in spending money and lots of padding in case things don't go exactly as planned. Then I calculated how much money I could reasonably be expected to earn working a regular job starting in early December, along with working for Aunt Amy (babysitting) and the money I've already earned. As it turns out, I'll only need to fundraise $176. I can do that! Even if I don't get a job till January, I can fundraise more and go from there.

Tambien, mi espanol es MUCH bueno! I really enjoy it. The language barrier has been a huge fear for me, and now I don't even worry about it.

So. That's the latest! Thanks for listening and for all of your constant support- please keep praying that I will grow in grace and that God would pave the way for me to go if it's His will!

9 comments:

  1. First of all, I'm so excited for you that you're excited! My worship leader says that sometimes (most of the time) we have to put our will before our emotion, especially in worship, and do what we know to be right even when we don't feel nice emotions with it. I think that - for you and me - leaving home may be like this in many respects.

    Second, it's funny you should say that about growing up. My church just last night had its rite of passage ceremony (you can look at my blog for details, it's rather complicated). But the premise of the whole thing is that, in God's eyes, you are an adult as soon as you are physically capable of reproducing life. But you aren't a mature adult yet. However, starting right at that age (the preteen and early teenage years) is when older adults should start giving these kids more responsibility, expecting more of them and also commiting to help them along and love them through the process.

    But one of the huge things that was pointed out for old and young adults alike is that maturing is a journey, not a destination. Even my pastor said that he had though as a child that after 60 he wouldn't have anything else to learn - but it's not true, he still hopes to be more mature this week than he was last week.

    So my dear, we've all reached adulthood. There isn't any more to it than this. But at the same time, there is so much more to it, because we'll be maturing spiritually for the rest of our lives. I was talking to my mom about something last night, and we agreed that we're all growing up together. I truly don't think we ever "arrive" at adulthood or maturity or anything like that - and to spend your life waiting to do so is a waste! So just be courageous and do the things that may scare you, because they are a part of a growing-up process that never ends.

    <3

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  2. As a very random side note, the security word I had to type for the above comment was "shlings." I thought that was funny. :P

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  3. I don't think we're ever done growing up.


    I saw the church you found in Costa Rica!! And I am so jealous of your ability to speak spanish!

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  4. Go get 'em, kid.

    And for the record, I think Peter Pan said it best, "I won't grow up!" Just some food for thought.

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  5. Me alegra por te (I think!): That amount of fundraising is SO doable.

    Con mucho amor, tu primera - adios!

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  6. @Kacy- Yes, yes, and yes. I agree with you and your pastor and worship leader. Especially how young teens and preteens should be given more responsibility and treated more like adults. That would help the growing up process a lot. That's so funny about the verification word too!

    @Kate- Thanks! I know, the church was SOOO providential.

    @Danny- I'll speak to you again when you refer to me by my name or an age-apropriate nickname. :-P

    @Julie- I didn't know you spoke any Spanish! that's awesome.

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  7. Despues tres anos de clases, debo hablar espanol! Pero, es muy claro que mi escribio (sp?) es muy malo. Pardon! (Where are the accent marks on this keyboard?!)

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  8. "After three years of classes".....that's all I got. And something about writing. I took French. :P

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  9. To Kacy: French is fun. Can you read French literature, or are you better at conversation?

    I said that "after three years of classes, I ought to speak Spanish. But, it is very clear that my writing is very bad. Sorry."

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