Lots of thoughts going around in my head these days.
Here's a big one.
Education is a huge huge mess in America, and everyone knows that, but instead of doing something about it Christians are turning and running. THAT is why I want to put my kids in Public School instead of homeschooling them. To me homeschooling feels like an easy way out and a cheat, like we're putting duct tape over the leak in our part of the boat and shaking our heads while the rest of it goes down. I want to cast my lot in with the masses and basically commit myself to going down with the ship if that's what is going to happen. Maybe a huge part of the problem with public education is that the people who really care about the situation and have the kind of principles/intelligence/vision we need to fix it are all jumping ship for something they think is better.
Of course the critisizms for this philosophy are that I would be sacrificing my children's wellfare for the sake of a broad ideal that we may never even reach. Is it EVER okay to do that?
I agree with most of you who disagree with me on this issue in that homeschooling is a better education and that public school has a lot of risks and dangers for someone you hope will be a child of God. It's just... do I want my children to have a better education and do I want them to avoid those risks? It sounds crazy, I know.
I'm basically saying, until every kid has the same oprotunity, I'm not going to give my child this advantage in life. If we beleive this, how far do we take it? Public school kids don't get a very good education. Kids from lower-class American families don't have money for college. Kids in Africa don't have food except for what they salvage from trash cans. Just by telling our kids about God we're giving them an advantage they don't deserve any more than anyone else, and it's not fair.
I guess for me this hits close to home because I hate it when people get head-starts in life that I don't. It seems unfair to me that I have to fight battles that for one reason or another someone else will never have to fight. I think we should all face the same demons and we should all move up in life based on how well we fight them. I even hate it when I can do nothing but thank God for advantages that I have in life over the majority of people I see.
I want black-and-white equality, like Ann Ryand talks about in Anthem. Everyone is born in a factory, raised in uniform situations and assigned jobs based on performance. But life isn't fair, or black and white.
And yet it's what I beleive in. Am I any more delusional than those who think they can actually uniformly raise republican Christians by sheilding them from the evil in the world? Am I a hero for fighting for a dying cause like equality, or just a fool? humm...
But I guess ultimately I feel that putting my kids or myself on an equal footing with the least-privilaged people in the world is a much better way to fight for equality then trying to rise to the top of things and then helping people get there too. "I'll help you" is one thing, "I'm here too" is quite another. Everyone hates those who are better than them and most people are too proud to accept that kind of help. To me that's always seemed condesending and rude, like some people just don't get it. Including me, probably, because for the most part I am a spoiled rich white American too. But I don't want to be. And I don't want my kids to be.
save your sympothy
who did you think you were fooling?
everything is dead
now you welcome me
to a town called Hypocrisy
Also, I met this really cool girl at Camp who I think you all would like tremendously, and I'm trying to convince her to get a blog. Her name is Crystal, and if she starts commenting then say hi and be really nice and cool and talk about Lord of the Rings a lot and maybe she'll get a blog too. :-)
