There is a tremendous difference between a satisfied concience and a satisfied God.
I think this could radically change every part of my life if I let it. I'm realizing that SO much of what I do- from trying to eat healthy to going on a mission trip next year- is to satisfy my concience. But my concience is weak and satisfied with the bare minimum. So long as I'm doing SOMETHING, I feel okay about myself.
But the truth is, what it takes to trully live in a completely God-glorifying way is beyond anyone's ability to accomplish, which means we should never really stop pushing past what we feel is enough. Kind of like the way Paul lived, all the time.
I'm wondering how many people persue good things just looking for a life of ease of concience, and then are content only to work in the smallest of capasities once they get there. Not that there is no place for behind-the-scenes workers, and not that there are any jobs less important or God-glorifying than others. But being content just to exist without being ready to do whatever is most needed of you really shouldn't be an option.
This has been really convicting to me, and I certainly didn't come up with it myself so I thought maybe y'all could get some good out of it too.
Tuesday, July 20, 2010
Saturday, July 17, 2010
it's a joke, nobody knows- they got tickets to the show
I've been sitting here looking at some other people's blogs and marveling at the kinds of things they choose to write for the whole world to see. It has occured to me that many will put just the tiniest bit of themselves out there, and not even the most prominent or important bit of themselves. It's just the part that they want to share, the kind of mood or way of thinking that they want to spread around. That seems really nobel and unselfish to me and I kind of wish I could be more like that.
I can never write posts about what I've been doing lately, re-inventing for all of you the blow-by-blow accounts of life as I know it. I get boared, seeing as I already lived it. Here is where I seek to find the meaning behind all that's been happening, and the more personal my struggles are the more philosophical I become, trying to veil the truth in the theoretical.
It really fascinates me to think that we all move around on this plannet doing things and talking about them as though they have face value- when they really don't. I mean, there are very few things in life so all-consuming that they actually get us out of our own heads. And it's the stuff going on in our heads that makes us enjoy one experience over another. The way things make us feel, the associations we have with them, and the things going on under the surface are all way more important than the facts of the experience.
Then again, I don't know if this is true or if I just want it to be true. Maybe we humans are, when you get down to it, pretty much simple creatures who seek out our own comfort and adrenalin rushes and warm weather. Maybe we only hang out with other people because we want to have fun, and then we try to dress it up as something deep and meaningful to feel better about ourselves. Or maybe it's just me that feels a need to dress things up in "meaningful" clothing. Opinions, anyone?
I can never write posts about what I've been doing lately, re-inventing for all of you the blow-by-blow accounts of life as I know it. I get boared, seeing as I already lived it. Here is where I seek to find the meaning behind all that's been happening, and the more personal my struggles are the more philosophical I become, trying to veil the truth in the theoretical.
It really fascinates me to think that we all move around on this plannet doing things and talking about them as though they have face value- when they really don't. I mean, there are very few things in life so all-consuming that they actually get us out of our own heads. And it's the stuff going on in our heads that makes us enjoy one experience over another. The way things make us feel, the associations we have with them, and the things going on under the surface are all way more important than the facts of the experience.
Then again, I don't know if this is true or if I just want it to be true. Maybe we humans are, when you get down to it, pretty much simple creatures who seek out our own comfort and adrenalin rushes and warm weather. Maybe we only hang out with other people because we want to have fun, and then we try to dress it up as something deep and meaningful to feel better about ourselves. Or maybe it's just me that feels a need to dress things up in "meaningful" clothing. Opinions, anyone?
Sunday, July 4, 2010
thoughts on existance
It has been a long day and a long time since I last wrote about anything, so I give you fair warning that this could very well be long and rambling and too philosophical for my own good (or yours). That being said, I have been thinking about the question, "What is it to be human?"
Considering this, I realize I've started in the wrong place in my attempt to question the meaning of life in one all-encompasing breath. To get to the root of the matter, however, I have to step inside my worldview- something I'm learning not to be afraid of doing. So I'll go ahead and ask the question and assume that it's the most fundumental question conserning existance I could ask: "What is it to be God?"
This is a mind-blowing thing to consider, because God is outside everything tangable. In the blank, black canvas of EXISTANCE there is God, and then in a one-inch straight line in the middle of the canvas is Time, in which exists the entirety of humanity and substance. This is easy enough to grasp when using the right imagry, but what happens if you try to take God away? Then existance folds in on it's self and we have to try to imagine that NOTHING ever happened or was. Which is inconceivable to us. So where did God come from? Does He ever wonder how He got there? To be omnicient, He must understand why He exists. And while that's a line of thought I, for one, can't follow through on, it's enough to consider that God relies on nothing to define Himself or His purpose in existing. He is not only self-sustained but self-defining, which I think is interesting, because everything else in the universe is ultimately defined by it's relationship to something greater than it's self.
So what is it to be God? It is, in a word, to self-exist. To be the end of the line of dependency and proof; to be the only thing in the universe that is only dependent on and proven by itself.
On a sidenote, how incredibly blessed are we that this God is wise, just, clear, and good? Had he been any different, the entirety of creation would have been vastly different- He could have made us all so miserable, and yet He chose (and chooses) to self-exist in a way that is beautiful and perfect for the cause of humanity. I find this totally mind-blowing! In a world where evil seems to prevail the vast majority of the time, the ultimate end and beginning of the universe is intrinsically... good. Wow! (I'm not sure that I'm on track here with this line of speculation; it's just a thought- but something to think about for sure.)
That being established, the question of what it is to be human becomes very easy to answer. God created us out of His own self-existance basically because He wanted to- because He decided that existance was good and in line with His character. In that sense, humans do serve a purpose just by existing. This includes both those who live for Christ and those who don't.
I'm really, really thankful, however, that my ultimate purpose in life is not just to exist. Because if that's the case, I may as well park myself on the couch and do nothing for the rest of my life. But this is not the case. I was called out of many, for reasons infathomable to me, to live a higher life with a higher purpose- glorifying God not just with my existance but with my heart, my soul, and my strength. To do this, I have to be working constantly within the framework of truth provided by the Bible- working to sharpen my capacities so that I can live better for Christ in every conceivable areana of life. And I've got to do this with the reckless abandon that shows I really believe it is THE only purpose to existing.
So in answer to the original question, to be human is just to exist. To be a Christian, that is to exist with purpose- one that will take a lifetime to fufill. At that, I can only marvel at the goodness of God and the beauty of the task before me.
I recently found a passage in Jeremiah in which the prophet starts to complain, in a very respectful way, about his life, which is feeling totally devoid of purpose to him. "Woe is me, my mother, that you bore me, a man of strife and contention to the whole land! I have not lent, nor have I borrowed, yet all of them curse me." (15:10) In verse 19, God answers him like this: "If you return, I will restore you, and you shall stand before me. If you utter what is precious, and not what is worthless, you shall be as my mouth. They shall turn to you, but you shall not turn to them."
This was absolutely incredible to me because it was as though God was saying, "Cheer up, your life is full of purpose. You are my servant, what could be more purposeful than that?"
So true, isn't it?
Considering this, I realize I've started in the wrong place in my attempt to question the meaning of life in one all-encompasing breath. To get to the root of the matter, however, I have to step inside my worldview- something I'm learning not to be afraid of doing. So I'll go ahead and ask the question and assume that it's the most fundumental question conserning existance I could ask: "What is it to be God?"
This is a mind-blowing thing to consider, because God is outside everything tangable. In the blank, black canvas of EXISTANCE there is God, and then in a one-inch straight line in the middle of the canvas is Time, in which exists the entirety of humanity and substance. This is easy enough to grasp when using the right imagry, but what happens if you try to take God away? Then existance folds in on it's self and we have to try to imagine that NOTHING ever happened or was. Which is inconceivable to us. So where did God come from? Does He ever wonder how He got there? To be omnicient, He must understand why He exists. And while that's a line of thought I, for one, can't follow through on, it's enough to consider that God relies on nothing to define Himself or His purpose in existing. He is not only self-sustained but self-defining, which I think is interesting, because everything else in the universe is ultimately defined by it's relationship to something greater than it's self.
So what is it to be God? It is, in a word, to self-exist. To be the end of the line of dependency and proof; to be the only thing in the universe that is only dependent on and proven by itself.
On a sidenote, how incredibly blessed are we that this God is wise, just, clear, and good? Had he been any different, the entirety of creation would have been vastly different- He could have made us all so miserable, and yet He chose (and chooses) to self-exist in a way that is beautiful and perfect for the cause of humanity. I find this totally mind-blowing! In a world where evil seems to prevail the vast majority of the time, the ultimate end and beginning of the universe is intrinsically... good. Wow! (I'm not sure that I'm on track here with this line of speculation; it's just a thought- but something to think about for sure.)
That being established, the question of what it is to be human becomes very easy to answer. God created us out of His own self-existance basically because He wanted to- because He decided that existance was good and in line with His character. In that sense, humans do serve a purpose just by existing. This includes both those who live for Christ and those who don't.
I'm really, really thankful, however, that my ultimate purpose in life is not just to exist. Because if that's the case, I may as well park myself on the couch and do nothing for the rest of my life. But this is not the case. I was called out of many, for reasons infathomable to me, to live a higher life with a higher purpose- glorifying God not just with my existance but with my heart, my soul, and my strength. To do this, I have to be working constantly within the framework of truth provided by the Bible- working to sharpen my capacities so that I can live better for Christ in every conceivable areana of life. And I've got to do this with the reckless abandon that shows I really believe it is THE only purpose to existing.
So in answer to the original question, to be human is just to exist. To be a Christian, that is to exist with purpose- one that will take a lifetime to fufill. At that, I can only marvel at the goodness of God and the beauty of the task before me.
I recently found a passage in Jeremiah in which the prophet starts to complain, in a very respectful way, about his life, which is feeling totally devoid of purpose to him. "Woe is me, my mother, that you bore me, a man of strife and contention to the whole land! I have not lent, nor have I borrowed, yet all of them curse me." (15:10) In verse 19, God answers him like this: "If you return, I will restore you, and you shall stand before me. If you utter what is precious, and not what is worthless, you shall be as my mouth. They shall turn to you, but you shall not turn to them."
This was absolutely incredible to me because it was as though God was saying, "Cheer up, your life is full of purpose. You are my servant, what could be more purposeful than that?"
So true, isn't it?
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